tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-49339713133482650612024-03-07T20:41:07.191-08:00Sarah Joy Zellsarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.comBlogger40125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-23250621135331170782011-07-20T14:57:00.000-07:002011-07-20T14:57:25.719-07:00I found my book!Oh yes!<br />
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I have been intellectually hungry for a book or teacher that could address my physical yoga practice while also acknowledging my spiritual lineage and academic passion. <i>The Heart of Yoga</i> by T.K.V. Desikachar rocked my world today. So rewarding to read the work of a man who devoted his life to intellectual study and physical practice, and acknowledges that these things can be used as a tool to bring our lives closer to God every day.<br />
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Not only that, but coming from a background in Literature, I crave gracefully written words as the medium for the information that is coming across. This book lovingly and thoughtfully explains a personal path and body of knowledge, transmitting it smoothly through well-written prose. I am smitten, and inspired, and thirsty for more.<br />
<br />
Thank you T.K.V. Desikachar!<br />
<b class="h3color"></b>Sarah Zellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04238477656276463971noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-12575319142910673102011-07-01T14:44:00.000-07:002011-07-01T14:44:41.857-07:00Shortest line to a farmerIn my family we have scholars and writers, pastors, entrepreneurs. These are the people who often get remembered in history: they write their own name and mark their own lives, they make a memory or a legacy that can be written and passed down.<br />
<br />
What of the farmers? Every family must have farmed at one point. Must have turned to the earth for sustenance for themselves, and likely for others, where the earth of one was better suited to grow one thing that was then traded for another.<br />
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How far back will I have to go? I can feel my ancestral heritage coming alive as I watch the fine cornsilk poke its head out to be fertilized, eat greens and munch tomatoes grown under my very eyes.<br />
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We will have to do some family storytelling to find out.<br />
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How far is it for you?Sarah Zellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04238477656276463971noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-36202110171558161562011-06-21T12:54:00.000-07:002011-06-21T12:54:32.900-07:00Solstice!The longest day of the year and I am loving it!<br />
<br />
Woke early, watered the plants deeply so they can soak up all the rays without passing out.<br />
<br />
... and what better way to celebrate the sun than to hang all my clean laundry out to dry? Everything was almost dry before noon.<br />
<br />
Showed lots of skin to let my body make all the D it needs.<br />
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Now an afternoon of providing bodywork and practicing yoga.<br />
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Thank you, sun, for shining today.Sarah Zellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04238477656276463971noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-50494454215803559612011-06-02T14:07:00.000-07:002011-06-02T14:16:09.935-07:00coming back to naturalFor about eight years I used to pluck my eyebrows veryvery thin, creating an arch that always said, "oh yeah?"<br /><br />Now I only shape them the tiniest bit, allowing my face to express itself in a fuller and more natural form.<br /><br />The funny thing is that they don't grow back all the way. I can still see the sassy teenager and early twentysomething saying, "I can create myself into whatever I want!"<br /><br />That is part of me too, part of my natural history, visible in layers.<br /><br />Coming back to our true selves can take a long time, and it bring scars and changes that we integrate in to the new normal.Sarah Zellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04238477656276463971noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-46432370532908161852011-05-26T15:16:00.000-07:002011-05-26T15:18:02.244-07:00Can living our dream be good for our health?<style>@font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 10pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; }</style> <p class="MsoNormal">On first glance the answer is yes, it must be. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Right? If I am in the sweet spot of doing what I love and making a living doing it, I would imagine that my anxiety and worry would decrease, my skin and hair would glow, and my relationships would improve in direct response to the calm feeling of contentment I would have from making a positive difference in my community while putting my skills to use.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">So why does it sound so stressful? I listened to a conversation of three journalists today who are each doing exactly the work they were cut out to do. They talked about the junk food they eat while rushing to finish a story, or the fact that they drop whatever they are doing to cover an important story, and how they are often rushing from place to place. It sounded horrible, and exactly like the kind of thing that would destroy a person’s day-to-day health, lower their quality of life, and shorten the length of it to boot.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The thing is, these people are glowing. I’m sure they could all integrate healthier practices into their lives, just like we all could, but I’m not sure they would be healthier with a more predictable schedule. We were each made to thrive in a specific milieu, and it’s up to us to find it.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">…and then be as vibrant as we can be.</p>Sarah Zellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04238477656276463971noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-37511377198574789352010-11-23T10:05:00.000-08:002010-11-23T10:05:00.130-08:00convictedWhy is it that we so often do the very thing that frustrates us most in others? One thing that I admire most is that people practice what they preach. My confession is that I have not been doing that, in fact I've actually been doing the opposite. In short, I have not been getting regular bodywork. Let me explain:<br /><br />Here's what I preach: I encourage my clients to get massage regularly. The structure of my massage practice is to work on fewer clients more often. After four years as a massage therapist I see how regular bodywork can allow for lasting, sustainable benefits for Western people, so I offer steep discounts for folks when they come in for four bodywork sessions over two months. This is working great: people are coming in regularly and integrating the work deeply in to their systems, letting their bodies trust that they are supported.<br /><br />In the meantime, in practice I am not getting work regularly! I more than anyone should know that regular massage helps our whole system work by watching it affect the lives of my clients. I also know from experience that getting massage consistently helps everything in my life work better: less tension, more mental clarity, more vitality!<br /><br />This confessional post is to hold me accountable: I will spend the next few months exploring different practitioners and modalities, and then settle in with one therapist and go on my own journey from the receiving side, which will only make me a better practitioner, and a better liver of life!sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-60288062294493588152010-11-22T14:11:00.000-08:002010-11-22T16:30:43.333-08:00integratingI am aware of many blessings: I am practicing a blend of shiatsu and Thai massage in my beautiful home studio in Santa Cruz, I am studying the human body from a Western perspective in Biology and Health Science classes, and I am preparing for graduate school in Public Health.<br /><br />It feels like the wildly divergent aspects of my life are coming together. Things that always made sense to me as part of a balance life manifested themselves in disjointed workweeks: a couple of days each in massage therapy, low-income public education, and farmers' markets. Now I get to research and write about how large-scale cultural trends in diet, behavior, and the spread of ideas manifest themselves along a spectrum of health and dis-ease among populations. In that time I will keep practicing bodywork, and then have the privilege of sharing the information that my education has given me: living it with a lifelong self-care practice, and spreading it via education and written works about how to live our best possible life. It's all coming together!<br /><br />I will move from speaking from what has worked in my own life and experience to a position of what has worked to promote health in bigger groups. I am aware of what a shift like that might mean: that for a minute there I may begin to say, "now EVERYONE needs to do this or that." I am also trusting that the amount of time I spend checking in with my intuition and my body to make the right choices in my life (see<a href="http://eveninginthegarden.blogspot.com/2008/11/make-joyful-noise.html"> </a><a href="http://eveninginthegarden.blogspot.com/2008/11/what-do-you-want.html">what do you want?</a>, <a href="http://eveninginthegarden.blogspot.com/2008/11/make-joyful-noise.html">make a joyful noise</a>,<a href="http://eveninginthegarden.blogspot.com/2008/11/what-do-you-want.html"> </a>and pretty much anything else I wrote in <a href="http://eveninginthegarden.blogspot.com/search?updated-min=2008-01-01T00%3A00%3A00-08%3A00&updated-max=2009-01-01T00%3A00%3A00-08%3A00&max-results=21">2008</a>) is going to pay off in being able to move through that phase into one that says, "statistically, a community should be doing X, and how can you see if that is a good choice for you personally?" I will constantly approach new bridges and find new options for synergy in my own life and philosophy, as well as opportunities to try on divergent mindsets for different occasions until I see how and when to employ one or the other.<br /><br />Integration. Education, purpose, renewal. These are the words that are coming in to my mind as I sink in to Fall, and continue on my path.sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-31324551693850639142010-04-27T17:02:00.000-07:002010-04-27T17:08:16.434-07:00Final MonthsAt the end of this summer I will move to Santa Cruz and continue my journey as a student and practitioner of the healing arts. I have been deeply nourished by my time in Oakland, both personally and as a massage therapist. Over the last four years I have had my studio and massage school less than a mile from my home, and I have sunk in with my neighborhood. I have only two months left to practice massage here and share with the community that has taught me so much, and it is with deep respect and joy that I am practicing here with you.<div><br /></div><div>Thank you for a lovely ride, Oakland!</div><div>Sarah Eve</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-12077979989943016882010-02-26T12:21:00.000-08:002010-11-22T16:26:05.991-08:00oh yeah!I rode 29.2 miles on my bike yesterday. All I needed was an excuse to do it, as it turns out. I was registered for the <a href="http://www.bikescor.com/solvang/welcome.htm">solvang half century</a> just a few days ago, and though I know it's just two weeks away, something tells me I will start the race and I will finish it. If I can ride 30 miles without going further than the grocery store for almost six months, I know I can go 50 with a few long rides under my belt. Here goes nothin!sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-30625319058771823382010-02-13T16:54:00.000-08:002010-11-22T16:28:50.408-08:00On the up and upLike a weight lifted, I can breathe again. Even though so much is still to be decided for our future, one thing is finally solid, and I can build a structure around that.<div><br /></div><div>Who else do you know who has lost jobs? Who else has had their plans changed dramatically in the past two years? I would love to share stories of hope and healing. </div><div><br /></div><div>At first it felt like, why write? Why write if I am not speaking from the centered, grounded life that feels the most comfortable to me? Why write if my life is all over the place and nothing makes sense? </div><div><br /></div><div>This is the juicy moment though. Remember that early post, <a href="http://eveninginthegarden.blogspot.com/2008/09/into-pain.html">into the pain</a>? In the difficult moments is where I learn the tools to do well at life. What is working? What feels off? Why do I think that is? What are my natural healing mechanisms?</div><div><br /></div><div>Sleep. I have been going to bed at reasonable times and staying in bed for hours and hours after the sun has come up. My body is using this time to get into some deep rest and have some bright, vibrant dreams, so much easier for me to remember in the morning. Even as a niggling voice is suggesting, "start getting up and doing something in the morning!" as long as I'm NOT getting up, I might as well get the most out of it. I figure at this point I have two options: sleep in and feel guilty about it, or sleep in and feel amazing every day, grateful for all that luxurious rest. Which one sounds the healthiest to you?</div><div><br /></div><div>Herbs. I love to incorporate herbs in my life: fresh ones in salads and cooking, and dried ones in teas or as seasoning. It feels good using potent medicinal foods as the things I would otherwise be eating or drinking anyway. Last week, though, I went to the store for two tinctures to use for the sole purpose of making me feel better. One to soothe my racing heart and mind and one to lift my spirits. </div><div><br /></div><div>Sun. My new home has a patio with direct light every morning, and I sit with my toes in the sun and soak it in.</div><div><br /></div><div>Things are looking brighter.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-17959401688036106242010-02-03T15:13:00.000-08:002010-02-03T15:20:44.428-08:00travelI am on the craziest adventure I can think of: move out of a beautiful home we couldn't afford in Los Angeles into my husband's parents' house for free rent in a city I had never heard of before I met them. Nothing but a possibly impossible plan about where we'll be next, and when, and how we will finance our lives once we get there.<div><br /></div><div>I am very nervous. Very excited. Looking to share my stories as I go and also worried about being too much of an online Diarist who shares too much of the intimate. Fear and worry are powerful things. I can be brave. I can be kind. I am strong.</div><div><br /></div><div>more to come?</div><div><br /></div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-71197331359700181932009-12-11T18:58:00.000-08:002009-12-11T19:01:59.836-08:00the in betweenhours after work and still hours until the party. no reason to start getting dressed, yet no reason to start on another project, knowing that Staying Out Late is a big expenditure of energy. it's like the space between breathing in and breathing out. when we're full and ready to move on in a moment. content, and also excited.sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-26923512314725559842009-12-07T14:55:00.000-08:002009-12-07T15:16:36.029-08:00my other car is a bikeI get frustrated when I drive a car around Los Angeles. I feel simultaneously blessed to have such a useful resource to move me and my belongings around. I want access to the car in this freeway culture. I want to log a much higher percentage of my miles by bike.<div><br /></div><div>I am wasting time thinking up scenarios where I don't have to drive so often anymore. They usually involve moving closer to my job or finding a job closer to home. Either possibility is frightening, and foolish since I know I will do neither in the immediate future. I still turn my wheels, spending energy dreaming up a reality that doesn't exist. (My house magically moves itself out west! My job miraculously moves 5 miles inland after 15 years in the same location!)</div><div><br /></div><div>Then I dream about carpools with bike racks and other more plausible plans, but those, too, are hard for me in a city where I don't know a huge amount of people like I did in my old Home. Resource sharing takes community building takes time. I am not a patient lady. I want what I want now! Change! I would probably be the perfect revolutionary: constantly sloughing off the present in hopes for a more functional future. I know though that there are certain things I am not willing to risk, certain comforts I don't want to put through the process of change. I want to hold on to certain things: my husband! a home! a laptop! Take away everything else and leave me these. ...and maybe our cat and some cute clothes and good books and my old diaries and photographs... Once I really look deep I wonder how much I will gamble to really have it all.</div><div><br /></div><div>And all the time I dream away, maintaining status quo at home. Dreaming of short, easy commutes by bicycle as I drive my minivan into the sunrise.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-70098757776202555682009-10-11T17:22:00.000-07:002009-10-11T17:34:59.080-07:00pick up books and read them"pick up books and read them"<div><br /></div><div>That is the message I am getting: read! Find out exactly what you want to learn, get the book, and read it. </div><div><br /></div><div>I have spent the last three or four years in a long, luxurious break from books, getting most of my information about the world from living in it: from I move around, engage in conversations, observe and work in the garden, take hands-on bodywork classes, sit in meditation, etcetera. It has been a wonderful break for my academic mind, and even as I was in it I knew that the time for study would come again. </div><div><br /></div><div>My excuse for a long time was that it was wasteful to spend money on specific books I wanted to read when there were so many books around me: I could go to the library, borrow them from a friend, or even pick them up from the sidewalk in front of people's homes. Now the desire to get exactly what I'm looking for in knowledge and information presented as well as writing style has led me to exactly what I want to read. Inspiration!</div><div><br /></div><div>just finished <i>Siddhartha</i> by Hermann Hesse</div><div>reading <i>Wild at Heart</i> by John Eldredge</div><div>next: <i>Care of the Soul</i> by Thomas Moore</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-3612931302971417872009-07-21T19:38:00.000-07:002009-07-22T12:38:17.981-07:00adrenalizedgo go go go!<div><br /></div><div>I am going through three major life changes right now: a move, a marriage, and a new job. Any of the three of these would typically be enough to throw me off or knock me out for a good long while. How am I able to handle all this? How is each major push of force and adrenaline not followed by the requisite crash? Among other things, there are instinct, desire, delayed gratification, and humility.</div><div><br /></div><div>I think I'm learning how to ride the wave of adrenaline. Everything is in such a state of transition around me that it I can learn to expect to work abnormally hard and I can remember to rest and regroup before absolutely necessary because it is obvious to me that I will have to work abnormally hard again in the near future. I can feel my instincts taking over a little bit: demanding more sleep in the morning, craving specific foods, demanding a silent meditation time. I listen and respond and I am rewarded. I feel alive and effective in the world!</div><div><br /></div><div>Another driving factor is motivation. Every one of these new things is something that I want and that I can feel are for my own benefit and therefore for the benefit of the world (one good thing brings out another, I find). Having the drive to move all my worldly possessions, or do interpersonal work with my partner, or make lists and email and text and meet up to prepare for a celebration feels easy because these tasks are an obvious part of the good that is happening in my life.</div><div><br /></div><div>I listen to my instincts, I want the change that the work is bringing about, and I know that there is an end in sight. My partner and I have scheduled a long break where we have nothing to do except for rest and replenish ourselves, and take time out to sink in our love for each other. Knowing that after the push there will be a relaxation time makes the daily effort feel like something fun and special, not an endless drone.</div><div><br /></div><div>The last and most important reason I have been able to keep working so hard is that I have help all around me. Knowing that there is so much change and transition happening in my life all at once, I have by grace learned how to accept help from others. When someone offers me help I normally like to say, "oh no, I got it" and move on. Recently I say "yes!" It is sometimes followed by "...and I'm not sure what yet," since I am a relatively new Help Acceptor, usually though, I can share the work. Ask my friends, I am accepting generosity every day! It is a fun and exciting practice. I am becoming available to accept the help that is offered to all of us at all times by strangers or the folks we know and love. It's always somewhere. We can find it.</div><div><br /></div><div>I can learn to accept more help and become a part of a culture of increasing interreliance! I can schedule times of rest after the heavy pushes in life. I can move when I know what it is I really want. I can listen to what my body is asking me to do and ride the wave.</div><div><br /></div><div>This is a fun time.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-52138623561998434742009-07-08T20:30:00.000-07:002009-07-08T20:39:04.273-07:00transformationRight now I am looking a new life square in the face: new job, new city, new marital status, new mode of transportation, new name!<div><br /></div><div>How will it feel? Will the new motions I do every day (hold the phone a different way, sit in a new chair, interact with a new living environment) lead to different strengths, weaknesses, and flexibility? Will my body language and facial expressions change as I participate in a new culture? Will my muscles learn new patterns of holding and letting go? </div><div><br /></div><div>I am ready for a change. It would have happened whether I moved or stayed in the same city, I can tell. How exciting, though, to be able to do it all at once! No expectations of friends and communities to accidentally or subconsciously live into. A pretty blank slate.</div><div><br /></div><div>New!</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-87911579670244817222009-06-30T11:18:00.000-07:002009-06-30T11:27:17.119-07:00range of e/motionWhen we stretch our bodies, sometimes we believe there is a certain limit to how far we can go in any given direction. Then sometimes, we work with a great teacher or we experiment on our living room floors or just sitting there and we realize that there is room for more openness, even in us! <div><br /></div><div>Often what happens in those situations, when we find space and motion in our bodies that we didn't know we had, we have an emotional breakthrough too. Different schools of study have found that we hold on to emotional memory in different parts of our body. We don't stretch it out if we don't want to go there. When we stretch it out we find ourselves experiencing more.</div><div><br /></div><div>I can imagine my body free from all the blocks I pretend I have: capable to move in any direction, fast, strong. If I can do that, I realize there is a possibility to imagine my emotional self that way: capable of moving through different stages and ways of feeling and work with them and use these different emotions with skill and care. Skillful the same way a talented athlete hones their strength toward precision.</div><div><br /></div><div>If I can imagine it, then it's a possibility for me. More range, more options of how I feel and react. More types of strength to meet more types of situations.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-90074686074118193642009-01-06T14:58:00.000-08:002009-01-06T15:10:02.297-08:00just sit thereTomorrow I'm going to the desert, and there I am going to sit for a total of ten hours a day for ten days. A hundred hours, sitting on the floor.<div><br /></div><div>My body will probably hurt. I have no idea what else will happen.</div><div><br /></div><div>While I'm there I will also not be talking, reading, or writing. I will have no verbal outlet for the train of thought in my mind, so I imagine I will learn to quiet it, and focus on things other than words, like how I feel and where I am right now.</div><div><br /></div><div>Maybe. I'm not even trying to guess. It might be the opposite of what I expect, as is always a possibility.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-37567835285939259532009-01-05T15:11:00.000-08:002009-01-05T15:40:17.019-08:00changing and staying the sameFor so long I identified as A Free Little Bird, a swallow/"golandrina", and I would fly wherever I wanted and listen to my instincts and learn from life all the time. Now it feels like all of a sudden I have this big ol' house and these amazing housemates and my little plum tree and I just don't want to go ANYWHERE. Thank you, Universe, for that. I get to sit and press my roots as deep down as I can, and draw up the life and nutrients that come from Sinking In. I have made new relationships and sunk more deeply into older ones. I feel like my little world could nourish me forever right where I am and I would continue to grow and be challenged and all of that forever.<div><br /></div><div>Except for the fact that the time for change is coming. The call to action actually came a couple of months ago, but I listened to the call of Unfinished Business and I have decided to start my metamorphosis while staying in place, then moving away once the sun thaws me out a bit.</div><div><br /></div><div>Adventure!</div><div><br /></div><div>Why do we go? Why do we ever stay? How do we know when is the time for each?</div><div><br /></div><div>Sometimes I know how to Listen: listen to my own body and emotions, listen to the plants and people around me. More often though, I simply worry: worry that things are not quite right, that there must be something more Awesome out there. Worrying, I will tell you, totally gets in the way of Listening. This time though, Life stood up and smacked me across the head and said, "Get a move on, girl, you're ready for something new now!" and I was like, "Daaaaang, World, alright already!" and that, basically, is why I'm moving. That whole conversation took about three months. Like I said, I'm working on listening.</div><div><br /></div><div>Again I ask: why do we go seek adventure? Isn't everything we need to know right here in front of us? In our own mothers and fathers, in the food we grew up eating and the air we have always breathed? I would say yes, it is. For me, changing my context simply means that I can suddenly See and appreciate all those little things that I always took for granted at Home. The subtle different reminds me how special is the Mundane. I guess it's just time for a reminder, to awaken my sense of Wonder at Everything.</div><div><br /></div><div>At the same time, in a way, this coming adventure will be a journey towards Home, and not away. Even though I will move away from the people and places I most identify with as a part of me and as my community, I will be moving far closer to the land I walked and rode a bike (and mostly drove in cars) on in my childhood. Closer to the culture of Image Awareness and Fitting In I so easily dismissed as a younger woman, and now am looking forward to engaging with and Looking at square in the face.</div><div><br /></div><div>What will happen to my Path as a healer and a lover of Health and healing and human bodies? I have lots of guesses, and lots of plans, and lots of acknowledgement that my life is not my own and I don't need to hold on to it so tightly if I don't want to. I will keep learning, I will keep growing, I will keep touching other people and stay open to the movement of the Creator in my own little life and in Life all around me, and all of us will see together what happens to each of us, okay? </div><div><br /></div><div>Life is exciting!</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-43861472301808288752008-12-30T18:58:00.000-08:002009-01-05T15:37:16.354-08:00outsideIt's amazing to me how different it feels to be out in "nature" as opposed to the city. I forget when I don't get out of the concrete that there exist places where a person can dig a hole or build a beautiful pyre out of found wood to light a fire. Next thing you know, my friend and I were making up songs in two part harmony. We get to express our creative selves in other ways in the City, but sometimes it just feels right to use my arms and legs to walk and carry and let my creativity come out in ways other than pen and paper or a cute outfit.<div><br /></div><div>Right? The Outside reminds us who we are on the Inside. Or something. Let's go play!</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-22386902594397721912008-12-29T12:03:00.000-08:002008-12-29T13:04:41.979-08:00trainingI have agreed to ride 100 miles on the back on a tandem bike on March 19. <div><br /></div><div>I know from experience that when I start training for a specific event, suddenly my body means something very different to me. This machine that carries my soul around and allows me to make contact with the world and other people transforms into a machine that must endure a certain physical challenge. This is special! This is different! Especially in this case because every pound of my body is an extra pound which my brother will be carrying. Let me explain.</div><div><br /></div><div>My brother has offered to basically pull me along on the back of his tandem. That fact makes this event distinct from the couple of races I've competed in (some runs and a sprint triathlon) because in this one, I don't have to do anything but sit there if I want to do. Here's why: both my father and my brother are going and my brother is too fast a rider to have fun riding this race with our dad and his friends. These guys, let me explain, are strong. They're far stronger riders than I am and may ever be, it's just that my brother is even faster. So my job is to make my brother's job a little harder by sitting there on the back of the bike. Easy right?</div><div><br /></div><div>Well, I still need to sit there for six straight hours, and I still need to keep my feet moving all that time. So, if nothing else, I need to train for endurance. Plus, I want to help. I might as well do something if I'm going to sit there all day.</div><div><br /></div><div>So two things are going on: I have an event to train for, and I am going to become a lighter creature. Crazy, right? I have the option of changing the size of my body. With all of the thinking and meditating and writing on the mind and body and spirit and community all being connected, this brings ups some interesting implications. I'm still wrapping my head around all of it, and I will keep you posted as I go. </div><div><br /></div><div>For now, what's coming up for me is being seventeen years old. That's the last time that I thought of my body in terms of how many pounds it weighed. The lightest I ever remember weighing was fifteen pounds less than I think I weigh now, though it has been about a year since I've measured my weight. And in a little over two and a half months I plan on weighing seven pounds less. Crazy! I need to go find a scale. </div><div><br /></div><div>What does this have to do with bodywork, then? If nothing else, it gets my consciousness into my own body in new ways, which allows me to connect more deeply with what is going on in the bodies of my clients and the people around me. I can see that my body today is not ready to ride a hundred miles on a bicycle and at the same time I understand that I can and will make it ready by diligent work over time. So I understand that the body is not stuck in its current situation. When I am working with a client on moving through a specific painful tendency in their body I hold the understanding that we humans are capable of change and not doomed to remain exactly as we are (frightening though that may be). That pain in your shoulder or back or neck or jaw or wherever that you think of as part of yourself or "just the way you are"? Guess what, it's not. We can keep it there if we want to, but we have the option of realizing that it's our choice to do so. We can move from weakness to strength through training and we can move from pain to free movement through similarly applied work.</div><div><br /></div><div>As always I start by talking about the body with the understanding that this same idea shows up everywhere. In each aspect of our lives, we are in training for something. Whether we consciously prepare ourselves or not, each choice we make sets us up for the next challenge: every experience gives us more tools we can use to meet the next situation life hands us. There are times to actively train and times to actively perform and times that are a little of each. Right now, for me, I train.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-58098375506425097552008-12-28T18:14:00.000-08:002008-12-28T18:21:07.980-08:00lifeWe are all alive! and we were teeny tiny babies once.<div><br /></div><div>I remembered this on Christmas Eve while holding a three day old baby, born just shy of six pounds: his trunk hardly bigger than my two hands cradled together. I could still see the ridges between his individual skull bones. I felt countless different pulses move as his blood, craniosacral fluid, lymph, and everything else buzzed around, helping him make sense of being Outside.</div><div><br /></div><div>And Inside there, inside his own little body, every little organ and system for creating, healing, and sustaining life is already fully formed and functional.</div><div><br /></div><div>It's so easy to be amazed when it's all brand new, but that's all of us. We're doing it: being in the world! What a miracle!</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-32521159314062878012008-12-22T10:36:00.000-08:002008-12-22T10:59:47.549-08:00drawing inThe winter solstice was yesterday. The nights are as long and the days are as short as they're going to be all year. Starting today, every day will be a little bit longer than the last.<div><br /></div><div>And I'm cold.</div><div><br /></div><div>Around this time of year, every year, I start to pull in my sphere of influence. I am in the house more often, or in my neighborhood, and spending more time with my most intimate friends and less time making new ones. I work less, talk on the phone less (and post in my blog less too, right?).</div><div><br /></div><div>I used to wonder, "Man, what is WRONG?" and now I realize, nothing. If anything, I've begun to wonder why the heck we try as a society to continue to act as if nothing was happening. For example, why would you go to work for eight hours a day when there are only nine hours of sunlight to soak up? We humans are part of the world, part of this planet, and this planet just happens to be one that has seasons. Times of growth and times of rest, time for bikerides and time for contemplation. Within each one of the seasons there are times for each, but in my life I notice that certain seasons make for better times to focus on different activities and aspects of my life. </div><div><br /></div><div>Winter is down time for me this year. Working less time. Also, danceparty time (somewhat surprisingly), and live music time: getting close with the folks I'm close with. Reminding myself to let people know I might not follow through on that plan we just made. Eating lots of root vegetables. That's my pattern this year, and honestly, winter caught me a little off guard this time around. It took me several weeks (months??) to adjust from my late summer self. Maybe by writing it down and sharing it with you I can make that mental note and remember to stock up for the winter and look forward to the long, cold days of rest and waiting for the sun to return. </div><div><br /></div><div>Because it's wonderful, winter, and if I'm here living it, I must be living it for a reason.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-17651587686786679542008-11-11T08:04:00.000-08:002008-11-11T08:23:13.182-08:00make a joyful noiseEvery moment of every day you are carrying around, even walking within, a musical instrument. Your whole body - from your toes through your pelvis and abdomen, then up through your throat and the top of your head - is a singing, breathing machine. <div><br /></div><div>Feel it: everyone who can speak is singing. The noise we are making with our mouths is the product of all the cells in our bodies joining together to make a sound.</div><div><br /></div><div>That procedure called singing heals us too. Whether we sing for joy or sadness, the sounds and vibrations move through our bodies to express what's really going on for us, and in turn shake and rock the painful or stuck parts.</div><div><br /></div><div>A few nights ago I was singing with some friends and I felt so tight in my neck. I couldn't think of how to help it let go of the clench. Another singer shared some tools she has learned along the way: let the sound come from your lower body and the throat can just allow the noise to pass through, and most importantly: sing until it feels good. Use the singing itself to make singing feel better.</div><div><br /></div><div>After practice I went into the garden and just hummed and groaned and sang and allowed my music-making body to relax into whatever sounds it wanted to make. After some good solid time with that, I heaved a sigh and knew that it was time to get up: what good work there was to be done was done.</div><div><br /></div><div>I felt relieved. My throat more relaxed. Just as importantly: I felt like I had expressed whatever it was that needed to be expressed and I didn't need to hold it back through tight neck muscles any more.</div><div><br /></div><div>I still have work to do: my neck, jaw, and upper shoulders is the area of my body asking for the most care and attention right now, and that healing session just scratched the surface of letting go. Often, though, scratching the surface is the hardest part, and after that it can all pour out.</div><div><br /></div><div>It feels good to know I have that singing tool in my toolbox for health.</div><div><br /></div><div>Now you: sing or hum (especially hum!) or chant "om" whenever it feels comfortable to you. Then see if you don't feel better.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4933971313348265061.post-88099633562511171502008-11-01T18:42:00.000-07:002008-11-01T18:47:06.991-07:00what do you want?How do you want your body to feel, what do you want your life to be like? I'm not asking what you don't want: "I want such and such a pain to go away" or "I want such and such a person to stop being so selfish", but what you do actually want to see happening in you and around you.<div><br /></div><div>What does feeling good feel like? What does a good relationship feel like? How about a life-affirming diet or a joyful workout routine? </div><div><br /></div><div>What exactly would that be?</div><div><br /></div><div>Feel it. Imagine it all day long. Act as if you already have it. Then when it does, we'll know a good thing when it comes along, we'll be ready for it, and we can integrate it into our lives.</div><div><br /></div><div>It can be slow if we want to, but let's go get what we want.</div>sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18040137110261917241noreply@blogger.com0